an excerpt of a conversation:
23:49… @jf-_^: i was watching a documentary on sasha baren cohen
23:50… @jf-_^: after i got bored of the untouchables
23:50… @jf-_^: how the fuck does anybody think sean connery is a good actor?
23:50… @jf-_^: he plays the same shitty fucking character in every film
23:50… @jf-_^: with the same fucking voice
23:50… @jf-_^: he basically plays sean connery
23:50… @jf-_^: the whole world is fucking stupid
23:51… @jf-_^: he won an OSCAR for the untouchables
23:51… @RoyBacon: i like the untouchables
23:51… @jf-_^: it seemed vastly inadequate after public enemies
23:51… @jf-_^: so i gave up
23:53… @jf-_^: but really, how is sean connery an a list actor?
23:53… @jf-_^: i could play myself in a fucking film
23:54… @jf-_^: i mean hes supposed to be a hard-bitten cynical chicago cop, and HE HAS A FUCKING SCOTTISH ACCENT
23:54… @jf-_^: FUCK OFF SEAN CONNERY
23:55… @Eagle\m4h: or hunt for red october when he plays a scottish lithuanian soviet submarine captain
23:56… @Eagle\m4h: but just because he always uses his accent doesnt mean he's a bad actor
23:56… @jf-_^: yes it fucking does
23:57… @jf-_^: acting is all about playing a character
23:57… @jf-_^: AND YOU CAN'T BE A SOVIET SUBMARINE COMMANDER WHO SOUNDS LIKE FUCKING JAMES BOND
am i being a penis, or does anybody else get my point? he could do the dialogue from highlander in the untouchables or the rock, and nobody would even fucking notice. GUY CAN'T ACT!
Saturday, 4 July 2009
diet
i hate my love handles: therefore they have to go.
as of now i am taking exercise seriously, and i'm not eating more than i need to stay relatively alive until i shed some of the waist-related blubber. what i want now is some upper body definition, and a lot less squidgyness.
got a fucking beer belly as well. time to move onto the vodka and oranges....
then i'm off shagging....
(oh, and i've got a haircut as well - the final phase of the 'pass-the-police-drugs-test plan' is now complete. application in the post on monday)
as of now i am taking exercise seriously, and i'm not eating more than i need to stay relatively alive until i shed some of the waist-related blubber. what i want now is some upper body definition, and a lot less squidgyness.
got a fucking beer belly as well. time to move onto the vodka and oranges....
then i'm off shagging....
(oh, and i've got a haircut as well - the final phase of the 'pass-the-police-drugs-test plan' is now complete. application in the post on monday)
public enemies
what a brilliant film.
its unbelievably atmospheric, which is achieved by a combination of brilliant shooting, editing, costumes, sets, plot, script, and definitely not least of all: acting. i pretty much just loved this film. not going to get all pretentious and write a review of it: the only thing i could possibly tell you is that its fucking awesome, and go and see it. now.
best film i've seen since in bruges, and the only films that may top it this year for me are inglourious basterds and bruno. the jury is out on whether bruno will, as a friend in the film business, who has acted with someone who knows sasha baren cohen has it on pretty good authority that, unlike borat, which was brilliant and pretty much off the cuff, a lot of bruno has been staged. i'm not sure borat was as unplanned as its reputed to be however, and it was still the funniest thing i've ever seen. i think bruno will be spectacular.
not nearly so keen on tarantino movies. i think they are tediously self-indulgent, and are basically the film equivalent of a massive bag of haribo: tasty, but they make you feel massively ill after a while.
i suppose theres always the chance that a film might come out of nowhere and blast me for six, pretty much like in bruges did last year, and naturally i'm hopeful.
its unbelievably atmospheric, which is achieved by a combination of brilliant shooting, editing, costumes, sets, plot, script, and definitely not least of all: acting. i pretty much just loved this film. not going to get all pretentious and write a review of it: the only thing i could possibly tell you is that its fucking awesome, and go and see it. now.
best film i've seen since in bruges, and the only films that may top it this year for me are inglourious basterds and bruno. the jury is out on whether bruno will, as a friend in the film business, who has acted with someone who knows sasha baren cohen has it on pretty good authority that, unlike borat, which was brilliant and pretty much off the cuff, a lot of bruno has been staged. i'm not sure borat was as unplanned as its reputed to be however, and it was still the funniest thing i've ever seen. i think bruno will be spectacular.
not nearly so keen on tarantino movies. i think they are tediously self-indulgent, and are basically the film equivalent of a massive bag of haribo: tasty, but they make you feel massively ill after a while.
i suppose theres always the chance that a film might come out of nowhere and blast me for six, pretty much like in bruges did last year, and naturally i'm hopeful.
Tuesday, 30 June 2009
coaching
took my 1st coaching session with the under 9 cricketers last night, was ridiculously nervous.
turns out as long as you shout a bit and look keen, its a piece of piss.
loving life :D
shame about the football though, losing 4-0 to germany in the final hurts a lot, but to be fair, england have a bright future if we're producing that calibre of player now.
massive grats to andy murray btw, he even showed some genuine emotion at the end. epic match, and i think we may have just witnessed the moment when middle england finally fell in love with him.
turns out as long as you shout a bit and look keen, its a piece of piss.
loving life :D
shame about the football though, losing 4-0 to germany in the final hurts a lot, but to be fair, england have a bright future if we're producing that calibre of player now.
massive grats to andy murray btw, he even showed some genuine emotion at the end. epic match, and i think we may have just witnessed the moment when middle england finally fell in love with him.
Monday, 29 June 2009
Thunder and lightening, its very bloody..... er shit really.
I don't think my cricket season is ever going to take off. once again circumstance has taken a big shit all over my day - this weekend it was the weather. As soon as we had finished tea and got set up to field it absolutely caned it down with rain. The other team kicked their heels a bit, but once it slackened to a dispiriting drizzle we were out. 5 quick wickets down the other team got a bit snotty and called their batsmen (to both of their disgust) in from the pitch. i must admit i was disappointed by this attitude, seeing it as poor sportsmanship in a casual friendly game. Unfortunately the oppo was proven correct when suddenly the heavens opened and it pure pissed down for the next 4 hours. We must have got about 3 months worth of rain in that time alone. Playing cricket with two banks of storm clouds complete with lightening and thunderclaps converging over our ground was quite exciting though, i will admit.
Sunday was a different beast altogether. Woke up with a bastard of a hangover (not helped by the mugginess and heat), and after forcing myself to eat and drink, dragged myself off to the flowerpot in kentish town. (nambucca 2). we were treated to a free 'We're Not at Glastonbury' barbeque by dave & co, and a glorious afternoon of cotching in the comfy sofas and chatting breeze was had. at one point maybe the two must drunk people i have ever seen wandered in, sloshed beer everywhere for half an hour, asked us if we were 'gay fucking cunts', and generally were quite entertaining. nobody was surprised they were irish. i think watching a large man with a popped pink collar and wildly rolling eyes attempting to chat up scene girls is the best thing i have seen since the hangover :D
later in the evening headed over to the abbey tavern for soundbites. Glorious band called little cats, with just a violinist and two accoustic guitars/occasional oud, stole the show for me. imagine if nick drake played the music at a jewish wedding and you're somewhere close.
saw the best bassist in the world too. only the singer/guitarist and the bassist of one of the bands turned up, and they played anyway. the bassist was about 25 stone and looked like one of the bad giants from the bfg, but my god the man could play. all his wobbly bits jiggled in time as well, only adding to the funk!
saw the worst band i have ever seen too - awful fucking band called hANK. tiny little stage in a quaint little pub giving it the full rockstar moves, complete with posturing and cringeworthy facial expressions...... they were also so loud it hurt, i mean seriously, where the fuck did they think they were playing? occasionally a tuneful melody might break out, which they would then proceed to bury under an embarrassing 5 minute prog-off. avoid this band.
Spent all the time in between having fun with mr andy mackay of celebrity chimp (remember the name) and alex and go.
what a lovely weekend :D
links:
www.n2cc.co.uk - my cricket club's exciting and spangly website
http://www.myspace.com/soundbitesmusic - soundbites at the abbey- if you're in north london check it out for sure.
www.myspace.com/littlecatsmusic - my band of the evening - loved them.
www.myspace.com/celebritychimp - purely because i now love andy.
Sunday was a different beast altogether. Woke up with a bastard of a hangover (not helped by the mugginess and heat), and after forcing myself to eat and drink, dragged myself off to the flowerpot in kentish town. (nambucca 2). we were treated to a free 'We're Not at Glastonbury' barbeque by dave & co, and a glorious afternoon of cotching in the comfy sofas and chatting breeze was had. at one point maybe the two must drunk people i have ever seen wandered in, sloshed beer everywhere for half an hour, asked us if we were 'gay fucking cunts', and generally were quite entertaining. nobody was surprised they were irish. i think watching a large man with a popped pink collar and wildly rolling eyes attempting to chat up scene girls is the best thing i have seen since the hangover :D
later in the evening headed over to the abbey tavern for soundbites. Glorious band called little cats, with just a violinist and two accoustic guitars/occasional oud, stole the show for me. imagine if nick drake played the music at a jewish wedding and you're somewhere close.
saw the best bassist in the world too. only the singer/guitarist and the bassist of one of the bands turned up, and they played anyway. the bassist was about 25 stone and looked like one of the bad giants from the bfg, but my god the man could play. all his wobbly bits jiggled in time as well, only adding to the funk!
saw the worst band i have ever seen too - awful fucking band called hANK. tiny little stage in a quaint little pub giving it the full rockstar moves, complete with posturing and cringeworthy facial expressions...... they were also so loud it hurt, i mean seriously, where the fuck did they think they were playing? occasionally a tuneful melody might break out, which they would then proceed to bury under an embarrassing 5 minute prog-off. avoid this band.
Spent all the time in between having fun with mr andy mackay of celebrity chimp (remember the name) and alex and go.
what a lovely weekend :D
links:
www.n2cc.co.uk - my cricket club's exciting and spangly website
http://www.myspace.com/soundbitesmusic - soundbites at the abbey- if you're in north london check it out for sure.
www.myspace.com/littlecatsmusic - my band of the evening - loved them.
www.myspace.com/celebritychimp - purely because i now love andy.
Friday, 26 June 2009
michael jackson
whats the big deal? i mean really?
find one mj song that doesn't sound pretty much like all the rest. i mean the guy hasn't got all that many truly memorable songs for a 40 year recording career really, has he?
its also quite funny how most of the time the world media is all over him for allegedly being a paedophile, for being an unfit parent, and for being generally mental, yet the second the guy pops his clogs we're absolutely inundated in 'heartfelt' obituaries from every second tabloid hack.
personally, i'm blithely unaffected by the whole thing - not even a tiny bit as upset as i would be if someone truly talented and memorable like thom yorke died.
glorious.
find one mj song that doesn't sound pretty much like all the rest. i mean the guy hasn't got all that many truly memorable songs for a 40 year recording career really, has he?
its also quite funny how most of the time the world media is all over him for allegedly being a paedophile, for being an unfit parent, and for being generally mental, yet the second the guy pops his clogs we're absolutely inundated in 'heartfelt' obituaries from every second tabloid hack.
personally, i'm blithely unaffected by the whole thing - not even a tiny bit as upset as i would be if someone truly talented and memorable like thom yorke died.
glorious.
Thursday, 25 June 2009
the hangover
...go and see it.
trust me on this.
then tell me you don't want a pet tiger or that guy to sing at your wedding.
trust me on this.
then tell me you don't want a pet tiger or that guy to sing at your wedding.
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